The most important fantasy football game of the year: KFFL Superbowl? First round playoff? That final win to get in to the playoffs? Nay, as Scotty and Kenny will both tell you, it is the KFFL Toilet Bowl. And, as the one who conceived of the notion of a playoff between the two worst records (not necessarily the worst teams, but this year you can make that argument fairly persuasively) the irony is, quite literally, killing me. The Nancy Boys made four moves today, the Rhinos five. That's almost more moves (9) than the rest of the year for both teams combined (14). Someone's starting to pay attention.
This is the first year since 1996 that the Dogs are not participating in the ignominious post-season challenge. What else happened in 1996? Clinton was re-elected. There was a bombing at the Olympics in Atlanta. Dallas beat Pittsburgh in the Superbowl. Michael Jordan led the Chicago Bulls to their first of three consecutive championships. That's a loooooong time ago. Their record in Toilet Bowls was a stunning 6-2, scoring 67 points last year, their season high. I would much rather be facing the Rhinos, who are 0-1, and are 8-15 against the Nancy Boys historically. In the interests of full disclosure, the Boys are 1-1 in Toilet Bowls.
The teams are fairly evenly matched, with a head-to-head record of 1-1 and about the same total points. If the two teams had been matched up every week over the last 15 weeks, the Boys would have an 8-7 advantage. So it's close, despite the Rhinos' 6 wins to 2 advantage in 2005 record. Both team's high game came in week three, with the Boys scoring 58 and the Rhinos scoring 76. The Boys have the big mo, consistently scoring more over the last four weeks. But both teams have suffered (even more than usual) as of late. For the Boys, Curtis Martin is out for the season, Kerry Collins was benched last week, and Aaron Brooks will be benched this week (quite rightly). For the Rhinos, LaMont Jordan and Kevan Barlow probably out, and Kurt Warner definitely out. So let the clenching begin. No-one really cares who wins the Toilet Bowl, but EVERYONE remembers the loser.
Labels: Blog
by Orson Scott Card
